The Beard Album – Review

The Beard Album is the fourth album from the pro-bearded propaganda band, The Beards. Hailing from Adelaide, the band is back and just as bristly as before.

Released in 2014, the album follows the theme of their last three albums by containing songs purely about beards. Each album is an ode to facial hair and as the album cover shows, this is clearly no exception.

The drummer of the band, John Beardman Jr, says that they attempt to express how joyous it is to have facial hair, which he says is “constant bliss and 100% euphoria, 24 hours a day”.

Tracks on the album such as There’s a Bearded Man Inside Me and  Hey You, Grow a Beard encourage the listener to grow a beard, regardless of gender.

Vocalist Johann Beardraven has a distinctive deep Australian voice that is seductive enough to inspire even the most barren of jawlines.

All The Bearded Ladies is a highlight on the album with its eighties guitar vibes and flirtatious lyrics such as “I wanna stroke your chin all over”.

As a whole, the album begins with harder rock songs and tapers out to folk tracks with a slower pace. With catchy lyrics that make you laugh and a rock bass line, the album is very easy to listen to.

If you have a beard, or just an appreciation for wiry whiskers, this album is definitely worth a listen. However some people  may find it to be a little too obsessive and even a little bit spiteful to the unshaven among us.

The bands popularity has progressed past  their bearded niche market and in 2011 they cracked Triple J’s Hottest 100 with their song, You Should Consider Having Sex With a Bearded Man.

While they could be seen as a parody band, the drummer himself describes it as a propaganda band. John Beardman Jr says that they haven’t even begun to express how they feel about beards with this album and will continue to get their pro-bearded message out to the world.

Following a European tour, the band is back in Australia for The Strokin’ My Beard Tour. The tour continues until the end of May and you can buy tickets here to make all your hairy dreams come true.

Written by Anja Kokkonen